To this day I continue receiving many private messages and questions about my previous post on Nigerian fraud on EHarmony. Although I'm no longer on EHarmony (yes, there is someone who finally caught my interest, by the way, I met him on EHarmony), I would like to give a little word of advise to whose of you who still are and run into the same problems.
1. One of the standard questions I asked all of the candidates was to describe something that they have not done and regret now. All "real" men had real responses, they varied, but they were reasonable. Some were willing to open up more then others; however, the responses were reasonable. My Nigerians always came back with ridiculous answers about being very fortunate and not making any mistakes. Give me a brake, we are just humans, we all make mistakes.
2. If he provides his personal email, it is always some free web based provider. I do use Yahoo for my private email as well, so it's not a give away, but something to keep in mind as a red flag. Additionally, IP address of an email originator could be verified very easily. Obviously if the person says that he is in Florida, but IP comes back with Nigeria or Europe, you have yourself an answer. If there is an interest, I can post on how to do or send me a private message, if you wish.
3. Pay attention to spelling and grammar. Although English is widely used in Nigeria, it is not their first language. You will see many mistakes; "I" would most likely not be capitalized, "cos" will be used in place of "because", etc.
4. Every one of my Nigerians wanted to communicate via a Messenger once in the open communication stage. "Real" guys want to get you on the phone and actually speak with you. My advise, refuse to use the Messenger.
5. Another give away, they were all away on a trip (although in my particular case, the "real" guy was actually away on a trip and I actually got spooked by it and stopped communicating with him, I thank G-d that he found other means of contacting me). So probably this one is not as much of a give away, but should raise a red flag.
6. He refuses to give his phone number under some lame excuse. Although, at the end of the day, only two candidates made it to actual dates with me, I spoke on the phone with a number of men. Every single "real" man provided his phone number immediately upon request or volunteered the number himself.
7. His name does not check out in public directories. There are various sources of public information in addition to Google. Use them. If the name does not show up anywhere, he is not real.
Finally, remember, if it smells like a duck, it's a duck.
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